Heartfelt Chronicles: Facing My Monsters

Have you seen the movie Percy Jackson? Remember how his mom stayed with that man who verbally abused her, all in the name of protecting her son from monsters? Well, I can relate—though my journey was about saving myself from my own monsters.

I dated men who were nothing short of monsters to avoid facing my own inner demons. I figured if I focused on them, I wouldn’t have to deal with my own traumas. Spoiler alert: I was wrong. The realization hit me like a ton of bricks on my heart, and it felt like my chest was caving in.

Let me share one pivotal moment. One day, while I was with one of my “monsters,” he suggested we

go out for seafood. Great idea, right? Wrong. When I expressed that I actually wanted to stay in, he lost it, yelling at me until I stopped listening. Do you ever tune out when someone yells? That’s what happened to me.

After his tirade, he mockingly said, “That’s why I don’t want to be you.” At that moment, I felt a tightening in my throat, a precursor to the vocal cord issues that would follow. I tried to speak but stumbled over my words. And then he laughed, calling me stupid. I remember standing in the bathroom, tears streaming down my face, looking at my reflection. That’s when it hit me: I had brought this monster into my life.

So, what now? I wiped my tears, put on some lip gloss, and walked out of the bathroom with a new resolve. I looked in the rearview mirror of my car and reminded myself, “Sophie, you have to choose YOU.” I decided to face my own monsters instead of seeking them out in others.

Since that day, I haven’t dated a monster since. We all have monsters to battle, and sometimes we avoid them. But here’s what I learned about facing your fears, and the five steps I took to confront my own:

1. Acknowledge Your Monsters

Recognize that the challenges you face are real and valid. Denial only prolongs the struggle.

2. Take Responsibility

Understand that you have the power to change your circumstances. You are not a victim—you are the hero of your story.

3. Set Boundaries

Learn to say no and distance yourself from toxic influences. Your peace of mind is worth more than any temporary comfort.

4. Seek Support

Talk to friends, family, or a therapist. Sometimes, sharing your struggles makes them feel less daunting.

5. Face Your Fears

Whether it’s journaling, therapy, or confronting the source of your pain, taking action is crucial. It’s scary, but it’s also empowering.

I’ve realized that facing my monsters didn’t just free me from toxic relationships; it also led me to discover who I really am. So, the next time you feel tempted to avoid your inner battles, remember: you have the strength to confront them. Choose yourself, and you’ll find your true self waiting on the other side.

Remember, monsters can be scary, but they can also be your greatest teachers. Let’s face them together!